Tuesday, 25 September 2018

Letter To My Eldest On Her 7th Birthday

You are feisty, strong, curious and stubborn. You don’t listen and you sing your own song. You drive me mad and you enjoy doing so. I am so proud of you. I am proud of how beautiful you are, how smart, how curious you are of the world. You have so much love for the world, for music, for art, for reading, for people.

A young girl sitting behind a white iced birthday cake in the shape of a 7 getting ready to blow the candles out.


I would be lying if I said that the year ahead didn’t scare me. It feels like we are drifting into the unknown; school is getting more serious, you can read everything around you and you don’t believe anything should be allowed to hold you back, except yourself. You frequently choose not to do things (like tidy up, go to bed or get dressed), but limits imposed by others? They aren’t accepted.

You still don’t accept the consequences of your actions or believe there should be any, you still struggle to control your emotions and anger, you still break my heart with your fragility and the innocence that I know will soon be lost.

This is the first year you could read this post by yourself, in fact you saw the start of it in my notes and started to read. I’m not sure I am ready, but I will write nothing, but a balanced truth. And the truth is I love you and I will always love you.

By the time you are 8 you should have a little brother. You already complain about lack of space, lack of time, having your toys and treasures touched. How much worse is that going to get? I worry that one day your demand to “go live at Daddy’s all the time” will be genuine and I will lose you. You aren’t my easiest child, but you are the one that made me a mother. We have had so many firsts together and nothing can replace that. We have been through hard times together, but I couldn’t love you any more than I do.

A long blonde haired girl in a red velvet dress

My wishes for you on your 7th birthday


I wish for you to tidy up all the toys you get out,
I wish that we can find a way to control your anger,
I wish that you will share with me what is upsetting you so it doesn’t bubble out in an uncontrollable wave,
I wish for you to find true friendship,
I wish for you to discover that it’s ok to make mistakes and to keep trying,
I wish for you to realise what you are capable of,
I wish for you to find a happiness in being you,
and I wish for you to know how much you are loved.

Happy 7th Birthday my big baby girl x

A young girl with long blonde hair smiling at the camera

A young blonde girl on a swing in the forest


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2 comments

  1. Aww! What a lovely post.
    Happy birthday to your girl. I hope she has had a great day x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, she had lots of fun, but she's getting a bad cough so we all had a bad cough. Boo!

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